[He laughed, because how could he not? She was ridiculous, but she had that 'wherever they fall' mentality about life that worried him, because while most of the time, it seemed things worked out for her, all it took was once. He was trying very hard not to think about what might have happened if he hadn't come along. It tensed him up, remembering the sound of her surprise and, yes, fear.]

A taser might be best. They have ones that are technically legal, but I might have to look into what this 'watch list' you're on means. I don't want to advise you getting anything that gets you in trouble. That would make me a shitty boyfriend and a shittier lawyer.